19 replies to this topic

[dreman04]

I sent you this same message through youtube. Sorry for spamming you, but I just wanted to make sure it got to you some way or another.

I'm not sure you will read this, but I just wanted to thank you. You (probably unknowingly helped me) through a tough time in my life. I recently graduated college, and started graduate school only to find myself in a situation I did not want to be in. I was in a long distance relationship, and for the first time in my life, struggled to make friends at school and work. I found myself spiraling into depression. There were days where I would simply just not show up for work/school. No one cared about me, and I cared about no one. Your videos and your commentary were the closest thing I had to a friend.

I watched all of your videos in the course of about 3 months. I actually ended up buying Minecraft because of your videos. I also bought Terraria and Project Zomboid as well as downloaded Ace of Spades from your "Indie Corner" videos too. All of those games felt like co-op even though I knew they really weren't. For whatever reason I felt like I was playing with you. You remind me of my dad when we used to play Super Nintendo and N64, so I thank you for that.

I recently dropped out of school and moved to be closer to my girlfriend. I am currently living out of her apartment and am jobless but feel happier than I ever was in graduate school. I am looking for work now, and am optimistic towards my future. I picked up Bastion and Wanderlust Rebirth from the Steam Summer Sales, and they are fantastic. I use them as distractions from the job applications, and I highly recommend them if you are into indie scene of gaming.

I started doing Crossfit and talking to my 2 roommates (best friends) from college again. I am currently training to participate in a Tough Mudder with my brother. You helped me turn my life around. I don't want to make this post longer than it has to be.

I love your videos and will forever be a fan.
Again, thank you Paul.

[Mr_Darn]

Whilst its great you can tackle the bulk of depression with Minecraft and Video's, it sounds to me like you are using these as a mask, to hide whats truly going on in your life.
Vurtual worlds are great for casual encounters, but you cannot let them rule your life!

That said, way to make a negative into a positive!

You seem to have used the vurtual world as an escape for some time now, but turned the love of the game into an actual job prospect. Most whom spiral into the online game world from a platform of depression rarely end up in your position, so grasp it with both hands!

I'm not sure who said it, but i remember a saying: Love what you do, and you'll do what you love.

Many never realise that dream, good for you! Make sure you stay positive and make room for the little things.

I too have suffered from depression, and the following helped me loads. I hope you relate to it the way i did, and see the steps you have already realised without being told:

Quote

Jar of Rocks
From under the table that stood between the professor and the listeners, the professor pulled out a big glass jar and gently placed it in front of him. Next, he pulled out from under the table a bag of stones, each the size of a tennis ball, and placed the stones one by one in the jar. He did so until there was no room to add another stone in the jar. Lifting his gaze to the managers, the professor asked, “Is the jar full?” The managers replied, “Yes”.

The professor paused for a moment, and replied, “Really?”

Once again, he reached under the table and pulled out a bag full of pebbles. Carefully, the professor poured the pebbles in and slightly rattled the jar, allowing the pebbles to slip through the larger stones, until they settled at the bottom. Again, the professor lifted his gaze to his audience and asked, “Is the jar full?”

At this point, the managers began to understand his intentions. One replied, “apparently not!”

“Correct”, replied the old professor, now pulling out a bag of sand from under the table. Cautiously, the professor poured the sand into the jar. The sand filled up the spaces between the stones and the pebbles.

Yet again, the professor asked, “Is the jar full?”
Without hesitation, the entire group of students replied in unison, “NO!”

“Correct”, replied the professor. And as was expected by the students, the professor reached for the pitcher of water that was on the table, and poured water in the jar until it was absolutely full. The professor now lifted his gaze once again and asked, “What great truth can we surmise from this experiment?”

With his thoughts on the lecture topic, one manager quickly replied, “We learn that as full as our schedules may appear, if we only increase our effort, it is always possible to add more meetings and tasks.”


“No”, replied the professor. The great truth that we can conclude from this experiment is:

If we don’t put all the larger stones in the jar first, we will never be able to fit all of them later.


The auditorium fell silent, as every manager processed the significance of the professor’s words in their entirety.

The old professor continued, “What are the large stones in your life? Health? Family? Friends? Your goals? Doing what you love? Fighting for a Cause? Taking time for yourself?”

What we must remember is that it is most important to include the lager stones in our lives, because if we don’t do so, we are likely to miss out on life altogether. If we give priority to the smaller things in life (pebbles & sand), our lives will be filled up with less important things, leaving little or no time for the things in our lives that are most important to us. Because of this, never forget to ask yourself,

What are the Large Stones in your Life? And once you identify them, be sure to put them first in your “Jar of Life”.

With a warm wave of his hand, the professor bid farewell to the managers, and slowly walked out of the room.

[JumboRancher]

Bravo good sir

[Matt]

Best of luck to you, hope everything works out and too you

Have an amazing day!

[Xintox]

Also, I hope you continue to be more positive and have a better and more optimistic life! I'm sure everyone knows that Paul's commentaries are like a friendly voice in the ear but none like your situation. Keep persevering and be prosperous! (and keep punching wood!)

Well done.

-Xin

[boogaert]

Thats a great story man, best of luck for the rest of your life

[swordmaster127]

Good for you! I'm happy for you.

[Kokeria]

This almost made me cry

[cmhcrafter]

I see what happened here. It wasn't ALL Paul or video games. All you really needed was a little nudge of positivity to show you that life doesn't have to be bad!

I don't mean to start any sort of religion wars or anything, but God can help you with that at any time in your life.
He wants to help you. He wants to speak to you and effect your life. All you have to do is listen.

Again, I don't mean to make you think that you are not a true Christian / Cause any religion wars, but that's just what I;m seeing here. Hope I helped!

[Mr.Man]

punchwood must be a small community because i see half of my friends replying to every forum i read

[GammerThumbs]

Good to hear. Games can be a great way to relieve stress.

[dreman04]

Mr_Darn, on 09 August 2012 - 01:52 AM, said:

Whilst its great you can tackle the bulk of depression with Minecraft and Video's, it sounds to me like you are using these as a mask, to hide whats truly going on in your life.
Vurtual worlds are great for casual encounters, but you cannot let them rule your life!

I agree in that video games were both my pass-time from being lonely but also somewhat my vice into loneliness.

In my first 6 months in grad school, I had friendly co-workers, colleagues, professors, and was actually enjoying myself. People would invite me out, and I'd always return the kindness. All that changed rather abruptly when I settled into a project. It's as if everyone was acting a certain way to get me to work for them, and as soon as I joined/started a project everyone decided to burn their bridges and forget about me. I stopped getting invites, started getting ignored, and thought maybe things would change. They did change - for the worse.

I found out my department had lied about several requirements of PhD students, they lied about where my funding was coming from and how much it would be, and glossed over other rather important topics. Honestly though, I could have forgiven ALL OF THAT, had I just found one friend in the entire city. That's all I needed. One person I could casually hang out with. When the school proved to have 0 people capable of talking anything outside of science/engineering, I looked elsewhere. The city was virtually composed entirely of retired upper-class wealthy couples, and undergrads. Nothing wrong with being either, but I'm at a different stage in my life from those two social groups, and needless to say I found no one in any of my efforts.

This is the point that I gave up. I was being ignored at work by my boss and co-workers, and I had no one to talk to outside of the academic environment. I had my girlfriend (whom I love, don't get me wrong), but long-distance is hard. Maintaining our relationship was probably the single most difficult thing I've ever had to do. She helped at times, but just utterly destroyed me at others to the point of tears. I've never been one to cry easily, but she often got the better of me somehow.

During one of my days of not going to work with no one noticing, I stumbled onto Paul's videos. His commentary is so good and personal, it was like I was talking to the first friend in months. I learned things about him as a person through the stories he told. I felt like I was in his house hanging out like I'd often do with friends in real life. I believe that was the thing I was missing. A friend. The video games were merely an excuse in making that friend. I think I played just so I could fit in with my newly made friend and know what he was talking about at times. I played entirely too much though. Often until the sun came up and my eyes being sore only to then sleep through work. I have bigger and better things on my plate now, so I'm back to playing casually and mostly with 1 of my roommates from undergrad in co-op or multiplayer modes. So this time around I actually have a real friend with me, playing at (and for) reasonable hours.


I didn't really expect anyone to reply to this, but thank you all so much for the friendly words! It feels great to (once again) have a social life, go out, and have a good time on a Friday night. My girlfriend and I already met a handful of other couples our age and with similar interests. I have a few job interviews lined up this coming week related to the work I was doing in undergrad and graduate school, so I'm pretty happy and hope I find something to occupy my time from 9:00-5:00. Not nearly as insightful as the Jar of Rocks excerpt, but Peter Griffin once said, "Everybody likes to feel useful. Make a da world go around." I guess I'm still filling my jar with the large rocks at the moment, but at least I have a few in there already

[Mr_Darn]

There is another one that actually made me smile rather than helping:

Quote

If, in Life, you ever feel that you are a no-body, that no-one cares, and no-one would notice if you lived or died,


Try not paying the Bills for a few months!

[miningsilver]

Wow just wow I cant believe you took your time to write that It is really big good thing is paul help you through depression thats what really matters is happyness

[paulsoaresjr]

Wow. Just wow. I'm honored to have inspired you and it makes me happy to know that you dodged life's little curve balls and seem to be doing quite well now. It's how life works...there are ups and there are downs. I have experienced many of both and I believe fighting through the tough times with your chin up is what makes us grow and become better, more kind and appreciative people, with more meaningful lives.

Thanks for sharing.

[cmhcrafter]

Barryb64, on 15 August 2012 - 07:36 PM, said:

Wow! You are not the only person to experience depression.  I know because I've been dealing with it, for years. I know everyone's experience is different but here's mine. I hope it helps. My depression was fueled by my personal fears and anxiety. I was born both visually impaired and hearing impaired and was told, "I didn't have a future." This was in the 60s. It helped that my parents raised me to be very independent.

This didn't sheld me, from serious bouts of anxiety that brought gran petite seizures. If I got too upset or anxious, I'd just zoned out.  What caused this? I was terrified of rejection.  I honestly belived that people would not give me a chance and dreaded a future in a group home. It didn't mattered that I wrestled in high school and went to college in the 80s.  I had difficulty trusting.

While I did know about God and later became a Christian, it took time before I could overcome.  It started with what God says about me.  Did you know that you're fearfully and wonderfully made? That's a direct question.  Did you know that God has a plan for your good? I had trouble believing this at first.  I had to keep asking God to change my internal beliefs as the were destroying me.  He answered and hep.  It was done through friends at church.

I think that I'd have liked someone like Paul talking in his videos. It helps to read encouraging stories from others.  It seems you got some, here.

Very well said, Guest_Barry64*.

[JYATY]

An Amazing Story. Good Luck!

[Applesauce26]

Good for you! Goes to show how much of a great guy Paul is!